Millie Mackintosh says she felt ‘all-consuming conflicted emotions’ and shares postnatal depression fears
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Millie Mackintosh has candidly opened up about her fears of developing postnatal depression shortly after giving birth to daughter Sienna.
The former Made in Chelsea star admitted she felt a mixture of “all-consuming” emotions after giving birth to her baby girl, who she shares with husband Hugo Taylor.
Millie candidly opened up about her experience with the baby blues as she shared a photo of herself with her adorable daughter, who is now five months old.
Mum-of-one Millie’s photo shows her sitting on the floor and smiling as her baby girl sits on her lap.
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In the caption, Millie got honest with her 1.4million followers about her struggles with her emotions.
She wrote: “Let’s talk about the Baby Blues! Like most new mum’s when I first arrived home with Sienna, I was totally overwhelmed by the love I felt for her, but I also felt very confused by the conflict in my emotions.
“I’d go from being euphorically happy, to being deeply sad and tearful in the same moment. Hugo would ask what was wrong and I was unable to give him an answer which only made me feel worse as I couldn’t explain these all-consuming emotions.”
Millie, who recently revealed the moment her daughter tried to say her first words, continued: “There was the irony of feeling so incredible lucky and happy, surrounded by cake, flowers, cards celebrating our adorable new arrival, yet feeling so stormy inside, which spiralled into anxiety as I feared developing post-natal depression (which did not happen), it almost started to take over the most precious time in my life.”
The reality star mum revealed she sought advice from her doctor after struggling for some time.
She said: “After 3 weeks of severe emotional up’s and down’s, I decided reach out and spoke to my Obstetrician. He told me it was very likely it was just to do with my hormones and to see how I was doing at my 6 week check-up.
“I found it helpful to keep a diary of how I was feeling, noting which days I felt sad vs happy so I could see everything in more pragmatic way instead of living in a tidal wave of my emotions. Over time I could see from the diary that there were less and less sad days, which made me feel more positive and luckily by 6 weeks post-partum I felt much much better.
“I found that being around nature really helped to boost my mood, so long walks in the park became a daily ritual. I was also very open with my midwife, friends and family about how I was feeling.
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“I know for a lot of people sharing your doubts and worries can feel taboo as you fear that people will think the worst and that you’re not a good mum. For me sharing those worries was a positive experience and I immediately felt those closest to me rally around to support me, Hugo and Sienna. They all checked in daily and reminded me it would pass and in my case they were right.”
Millie then urged her followers who may be feeling the same way to speak out.
She said: “If you you are experiencing the baby blues please don’t be afraid to vocalise it and if you feel like post-natal depression could be setting in then seek professional help as soon as you have those thoughts and feelings. Remember you are never alone!”
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