My brother's abusive girlfriend controls his money but he still stays with her
DEAR DEIDRE: MY younger brother is in an awful relationship but won’t leave for the sake of their three-year-old son.
He is 26, I’m 27 and his girlfriend is 28. She’s done all she can to isolate him and banned him from seeing family or friends.
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He’s not allowed out except for work, she confiscates his money and monitors his every move.
She’s accused him of cheating on her with a granny, a schoolgirl – anyone who comes near him.
It’d be ridiculous if she wasn’t so dangerous.
Occasionally he breaks away and confides in me but he always goes back because of their child.
She sends him vile messages, telling him how useless and disgusting he is.
He says he thinks about suicide and hates his life.
They both have learning difficulties which makes it harder to support him.
DEIDRE SAYS: He has good intentions, clearly, but staying with someone so destructive is harming him and will be damaging for their child.
They both need support to realise there is no future like this.
His girlfriend needs help to understand how cruel her behaviour is. If she can’t overcome this, he must consider a permanent change.
Could he apply for custody of their child?
You need help with this, so see Mencap at mencap.org.uk.
You can Call its Learning Disability Helpline on 0808 808 1111.
The charity will understand the issues.
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