Representation is going to the dogs

Mankind may be out of work — animalkind, not. Quarantine’s Internet dog, a talking schnauzer adored by humans such as Jennifer Aniston and Katherine Heigl, just got a rep. Gotham Group, who produced Disney’s “Stargirl,” signed Pluto. Deadline says a TV project will be the first bone thrown to her.

Lest you live in a doghouse, Pluto found fame with PSAs (Pluto Service Announcements). Pluto’s owner, Canada-based Nancie Wight, decided on a video featuring Pluto that could cheer people up during lockdown. Now social media scratches out millions of views. And hustle merch too. Pluto’s barked about the toilet-paper crisis. Working well for her were arfs about where to find snacks, growls concerning social distancing and selfish grrrs over sniffing crotches.

Wonderful. If only that hound could teach Jellybean, my 6-month-old Yorkie, to pee on a wee wee pad instead of my floor, I’d be insanely grateful.

Listen, here’s what I hear . . .

Geriatricians say Biden doesn’t need a VP, he needs a health aide. Some politicians say they want to buy de Blasio out of his contract. A few clinicians say, “Enough with Fauci.” He’s had more screentime than Brad Pitt.… Statisticians say Dr. Phil disagreeing about CV trajectories? Ding bats giving medical advice? Fashionistas say shove Dr. Birx’s daily scarves. Who believes somebody when something’s off about them? Get her a crappy necklace or a turtleneck.

Realtors say Macklowe and Brookfield interested in 55th Street’s Friars clubhouse, whose price just dropped. First they need air it out — not from the pastrami aroma, but from those who thought its payroll equalled their bankroll. Floridians say yes, you may go in the water and walk the beach, but, no, you can not bring a towel or blanket.

Producers say it’s not economical to take out every five theater seats so only 300 people can see a Broadway show.

…World news says Guyana had a presidential election in February but don’t know who won yet. They’re still counting the votes.

Twitter says President Trump has nearly 80 million followers. Nancy Pelousy always says something — but whothehell cares.

George Bush’s former Surgeon General and Pataki’s former health commissioner Dr. Antonia Coello Novello says: “I want to shut up anyone saying African-Americans are more at risk. We are all at risk. We cannot be hostage to that thought. They cannot divide us.”

RIP to a good egg

We just lost TV’s Phyllis George. Once Diane Sawyer’s morning news replacement, her contract required her own hairdresser, her own makeup guy, his own limo for their 4 a.m. call. She interviewed big-time. People like Billy Graham. Lived biggertime. Dinner with the Clintons. In ’84, my psychic predicted her then-husband Kentucky Gov. John Brown wanted to be president. Phyllis lived good. May she be taken care of this well forever.

Something fun to ‘Doo’

Due for theaters, animation’s heavily budgeted “Scoob!” — Amanda Seyfried, Zac Efron, Mark Wahlberg, Simon Cowell and their kids — is now on home screens.

Simon: “I watched ‘Scooby-Doo’ as a kid. Now my Eric, age 6, loves it. But he’s a competitive nightmare. He knows he’s better [at playing games] than I am.” I start and end the column with dogs. So watch ““Scoob!”. Throw it a bone.

One consigner offered Real Real shoes. “No,” said RR. “Nobody’s walking around.” Another, designer luggage. “No. Nobody’s traveling. We need Chanel suits. Our clients want them for at-home Zoom interviews.”

Only in New York, kids, only in New York.

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